In a previous post I mentioned how I refuse to allow events that happened more than 30 years ago define who I am today. This is an opinion that I’m pretty passionate about and I basically call it my Suck It Up philosophy. To some that may sound harsh, but what it means is that when you face tough times you pick yourself up by the bootstraps and keep moving forward. For me to do anything else is simply unacceptable.
I am a frequent listener to sports talk radio and the big story this week has been the Penn State child sex abuse scandal. The fact that adults decided that the reputation of a university was more important than protecting young boys from this pervert absolutely sickens me. Adults thinking that their responsibility ended with reporting this to their superiors sicken me. The fact that they allowed this man back on campus astounds me. There are several aspects of this situation that are just unsettling.
What are also troubling though are some of the commentaries I’ve heard and some of the remarks made by callers. A lady caller to the Paul Finebaum show yesterday evening said that she was molested as a kid and it totally ruined her life and damaged her forever. Obviously I am not a woman, so maybe it’s different for females, but I was molested when I was 10 and for me to say that it ruined my life and damaged me would be ludicrous. Has it affected me? Sure it has, but ruined me? Not by any stretch of the imagination.
To me it’s pretty simple; you can chose to be a victim or you can chose to be a survivor. Telling yourself that you’re not going to be a victim doesn’t mean that it will be easy and that there won’t be struggles, but keeping your head straight goes a long way toward helping. Thankfully I heard another caller this morning express this very sentiment, so not everyone wants to play the victim card, some people realize that they have choices to make. If you say to yourself that your life is ruined and you’re damaged you will be; it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. Being a victim is easy, you get all kinds of attention and you don’t have to take any responsibility for your screw-ups.
The crazy thing is that this society allows people to be victims. I can’t tell someone to suck it up because that’s insensitive. Alcoholics have a disease, they aren’t people who have no self-control and don’t care enough about themselves and others to stop drinking, and they’re “powerless against it.” The basic philosophy behind drug and alcohol treatment is flawed because we tell them that they have a disease. We allow them to be victims of that “disease” instead of telling them to suck it up and take responsibility for their lives.
It’s time to quit allowing people to point to distant events as an excuse for their behavior; if we don’t we’re giving the kids that Sandusky molested an excuse to do it to others.
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